Children are not a burden to escape or endure; they are a blessing that drives us to Christ because we are incapable of parenting well without Him. - Kim Brenneman

Friday, October 15, 2010

Family size

I've been wanting to write a post on this for sometime. It seems to be such a sensitive subject that gets people VERY opinionated. I grew up in a family of 4 children... me, my older sister and brother are all my mother's biological children, and my little sister is adopted. I have friends who are only children and I also have friends who are a part of a family of 14 children. Now with my own children and having friends who have children I find i am encountered with it more often. I love large families. Yes, they have their pro's and con's.. just like anything does.. but the majority of large families i know are precious and well balanced. I personally always wanted 5 children... 3 boys and 2 girls. Circumstances have enabled my dream to be partly fulfilled, and for the time being it looks like we may only ever have 3 children. Though i don't like to say that I'm done... I am open to the idea of adoption and I know that the Lord could miraculously bless us with more biological children.. but at this time it's not something that we feel called to pursue. I get a lot of questions on if we are going to keep trying to have a girl. Which is funny... yes i was hoping that when we were pregnant with Elijah we would have a girl, but it didn't make me love him any less when we found out his gender... in fact i think it made me love him more and have to lean on Jesus even stronger because of the difficulties that we had with our first two boys. And let me tell you Elijah is a BLESSING and i would NEVER trade him, or any of my sons for a daughter. Anyway this is my point and my tangent... I think that we need to get past apologizing for the amount of children that we have or don't have. Be it only 1, or 14... I think the Lord allows some to have many children and others to only have a few and each family is not any better or less then the other. Let me share a verse on children...

Psalm 127:3
Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him.

a REWARD! Children are a reward! I know sometimes (at least for me) it may not feel like they are a reward... more like a punishment, but they are a REWARD. I think we have to change our perspective here as a culture... ESPECIALLY in the Christan community. There seems to be so much judging that goes on when someone chooses to have more then three children.. and heaven forbid they are any closer then a couple years apart because that's just CRAZY, or if they choose to stop at one. OH i am sooo tired of hearing that and dealing with it. I wish that we could have a dozen kids... i wish that i had health to handle more pregnancies and the patience and love for more children,I wish that Matt wanted more children, but for right now God gave me three.
So whether you have no kids, 2 kids, or you are going on your 19th, please remember this verse and DO NOT apologize for the amount of children that you have.. each and every life is precious .. even if they have no siblings or a dozen siblings! Psalm 127:3
Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him.

2 comments:

Leanne said...

Wow.

You know me and you totally know my story.....

I used to feel self conscious about the size of my family, but now, wherever we go, people stare and I say.....

BRING IT ON!!!!

I really, really loved this post. I know lots of families with lots of kids and they all feel the way I feel.

People used to ask me if we were going to try till we got another boy....yeah, as if that's the reason why we're having kids, just to have another boy!! When they find out that we only have one boy, they're always like oh poor boy! And they claim to be Christians! This anti-family mentality isn't just confined to the world.

Anyway, you are a blessing and God is NOT finished with you yet!!!!

LOVE YA!!!

My Little Warriors said...

Thanks Leanne.. I LOVE YOUR FAMILY!!!! And i basically think your kids are amazing!