Learning to let go

special needs or special educational needs

— pl n
a. the educational requirements of pupils or students suffering from any of a wide range of physical disabilities, medical conditions, intellectual difficulties, or emotional problems, including deafness, blindness, dyslexia, learning difficulties, and behavioural problems

It seems like i have to rehash this issue over and over often, but each time I'm learning to let go sooner. Letting go of taking my children's behavior personally.. letting go of trying to make them "normal", letting go of how other view me, letting go of how others view my children, letting go of fear for the future. It's SO easy to look at someone else situation and have an easy answer for how things can be better for them, but in my own life i often feel overwhelmed and burnt out. There is always something that needs to be done. On top of the normal everyday life of family, we have the extras to worry about. I think the past 3 years have been so overwhelming for us, we just shut down a bit and kept to ourselves because there was so much that we just had to process and learn about raising children who have extra needs. I feel like we are finally coming out of that cloud of confusion, the sun is burning off the clouds and we can feel more hope shining though. The big part of the journey has just been learning to let go of what the world thinks, cling to Jesus, and to learn about our children and let them be themselves. That is so much easier said then done! But in all seriousness, God has given us (and especially me) so much grace and He has really opened up my eyes to His never ending, never tiring, never impatient love for me. And the ONLY way that I can be anything good for my boys is to lean on His strength. I don't know how people can raise special needs children (or any children for that matter) without Jesus! Whew... let me tell you! I know that I'm human and I will more than likely struggle with these feelings on and off though the years, BUT I know that there will ALWAYS be a God who will be willing and ready to mend my poor, tired, and wounded soul back to a spirit of joy and hope once again.