fragments on a summer night

I know I've been gone for a while.

Life is busy in the summertime for us.

The wild daisies are in full bloom right now.. so much beauty.. if I have a chance maybe i'll snap a shot for you of our field of daisies.

Father's day feels weird this year. I forget that I still have a father who is alive... I still have to send him a card. That makes me feel like a bad daughter, but then again, it's not like he has been a stellar father.

I miss the man that God gave me as a father. I miss Marty. It would have been his 53rd birthday this week. It feels strange. I miss him at the strangest moments. Mostly when I think about how my boys will have very little to no memory of him. They won't know what it's like to go fishing with him, or to stub their toe and have him pull out a knive from the kitchen drawer and threaten amputation (i know that sounds funny... but it actually is a warm memory for me, because of course he was joking and would try to get my mind off the pain) . They won't know what it's like to get the cranky squeezed out of them, or go on long bike rides, or hear stories about flying a B-52 bomber that was about to fall apart across the country. They won't get to hear about his love of airplanes. They won't get to sit in that airplane that was sitting in the garage and pretend to be flying high over the city. They won't be able to sit and ask advice and absorb the wisdom. I'm so thankful that he got to meet my boys.. i just wish he could have seen them grow up, i wish they could have known him.

Lemonade is tasty.. and i am tired. Goodnight friends and strangers who happen upon this site.