We called him Marty

Some of you know a bit about my background and some of you know nothing. In a nutshell, my parents where non-christians, got divorced when i was 2 and my mom was left alone to raise three children. There is a long story about grace and redemption and the awesome power of God in all of this, BUT for now you get the basic backdrop. Now that you know the basics I can move on...

We called him Marty. God put him into our lives at a time where our family was falling apart. He stepped up, chose to follow the Lord and to be a leader to my mom and point her to Jesus. The Lord used him to save my mom from a very hopeless place, and in turn saved our family. After a few years of friendship and then dating they got married when i was 7 years old. I can't remember a time without him. He always was there, constant and loving. A steady rock on shaky ground. My birth dad wasn't around much and was very much a stranger to me, but Marty, he was the man. He wasn't my dad... he was MARTY. In my young heart, Marty meant DAD. The name Marty to me evokes more feels of love and stability then words that are generally associated with a father. Over the years i tried my hardest to call him Dad, or daddy, or papa... but it always felt wrong. Like i was betraying the very core of who he was and that i was implying that he was something less to me. I've told him that many times.. and i know that he understands that I am and always will be his daughter and little girl. I have so many great memories.. maybe not so great for him (like throwing up all over his back while we were taking a walk one day and then screaming "SOMEBODY HELP ME" while he was carying me back to the car)... but to me that's a great memory of love and care and comfort. I owe so much of my choice in a husband to Marty. He showed me the way that a husband should treat a wife. He loved my mother so much... he treated her with so much love and respect. They made such a great team and I would not be the woman i am today without the great parents they made. I love what my older sister said in her speech that she wrote for his funeral and i want to share it with you...

I can’t tell you when the first time I met Marty was, but what I can do is tell you what he was like through my eyes as a dad.

See I was about 11 years old the first time I realized “This guy just is NOT going away!” Mom kept inviting him over, inviting him on outings, even asking him to come over to help me with my math homework. She said “he’s good at math, he knows better than me.” I was like “whatever mom”. All the usual attitude and awfulness that I tried was not working on him. He kept coming back!

As time went on I noticed he wasn’t just being nice because he liked my mom…he actually like us. He cared! And he was kind of Fun too…I mean what is cooler to an 11 year old than a pilot with his own airplane!

I loved going up in that little Cessna! Sometimes I even got to fly it for a little bit. We would fly up to Voyager Village in Wisconsin, just outside of Siren, for the fly-in brunch; always taking enough fuel for the “Scenic Route”.

Marty loved the “Scenic Route” whether it was the coffee shop for a “jolt” (he loved his espresso) or our vacation at Yosemite or The Big Island, often wanting to explore the path less traveled.

He was different for sure. Some of you may remember that Black Mercury that he drove. It had a rocket switch glued to the dash that was labeled with something like “blast of” or “turbo” not sure of the exact wording. But I hope that wasn’t his idea of a chick magnet. Although it’s possible that’s why he stayed single for so long before my mom had the chance to snag him.

Marty snatched up every opportunity to teach us something he was passionate about as well as things we needed to know. He stressed the importance of “doing it right”. I’m not going to say I soaked it all up, to tell you the truth, he liked to give these elaborate instructions and in-depth examples that would just go on FOREVER! I suppose that was a good thing in his line of work.

As I look back now Marty handled marrying a lady with 3 kids with a ton of grace! Yeah, there were plenty of growing pains, but an infinite amount of love. Often wrapping his arms around me with a big hug, knowing just when I needed one. He made a point to tell me how nice I looked or that he was proud of me.

Other fond memories I will share is with the family at the Kuhn’s cabin in Wisconsin near Turtle Lake. The beach was pretty gross, so Marty would take us out to the middle of the lake on the Pontoon, without a motor only a couple oars, and spend hours out there so we could swim weed and muck free. He also taught us to fish up there, no not how to catch the sunny’s in a net fishing from the dock (he always made us throw those back I promise), but real fishing with a rod and lure. Only thing is he also taught us how to clean them. I’m pretty sure that has something to do with the fact that my diet consists of very little fish.

I can’t speak for all of us kids, but I can say I wasn’t an easy teenager, although we all had our bedroom doors removed at some point or another. Funny I tried that with my own teenager but the mess trickled from her room, to the hall way, encroached on the living room and soon she had her door back…guess it doesn’t work for all teenagers. I’m learning as I go, just as he and mom had to. He did reassure me recently that I was just “boot camp”. That was comforting.

He taught me how to love and protect my kids…let me be clear, I am not giving him all the credit here because I have learned a lot from my mom too, but truly together, they made a Great Team!

As a dad he was Top Rate, One-Of-A-Kind and will live in my heart forever.



I want to share this verse with you today because Marty's last words were "I am free, lift up your hands and praise god":

Psalm 118:5

‘In my anguish I cried to the Lord

and he answered by setting me free’

I'm sure in these coming days, and weeks i will share more with you... because having such a great man be a dad to me when he didn't have to be, but he CHOSE to be for the past 20+ years and then being there with him and watching him go home into the arms of Jesus has made a substantial impact on the core of my being... There is just so much to share. For now.. Thank you friends for the prayers and the thoughts.